Saturday, December 31, 2011

Greetings from California!

Well, the time is nearing where I will fly back to Chicago but I figure I write from here so that maybe some California sunshine will warm our blog up.

See, it's still green over here.

First of all I'd like to say, Happy New Year to all the readers and spiders out there. I'm not gonna do much tonight, I'll be drinking some cranberry vodkas, counting down, and hopefully try to convince my city friends to play some good'ol Werewolves of Millers Hallow. This is because I love that game and I have Montana to thank for that.
Yesterday I went to a party/gathering of yelling people for a UFC fight. There were enchiladas, a very fast acting referee, and a very interestingly decorated cake involved.


Usually when I come back to California I have a checklist of things that need to be done:

  • In N Out (is a must because there is no better burger than In N Out, I dont give a fuck what anyone says I will stand by their toasted buns, freshly cut fries, and simplistic menu.)
  • Disneyland (it's the happiest place on earth, duh. Sam may say that Disneyworld has a better castle and scarier Tower of terror, but hey, Disneyland is the OG in the OC.)
  • Shorts in the winter (yes, yes, yes. California can be boring as shit if you dont have a car but you can at least wear shorts and skirts when the east coast is wearing down coats)
  • Play with dog (I know, this only applies to me but look how adorable she is:)

I've pretty much got all of them checked off.

Also, in earlier news. Sam and I rode the Christmas train and it was literally the ride of my life. When the train rolled up it smelled like Christmas. The inside was packed like sardines, but the seats had Christmas fabric on it. The ads were'nt ads because they were Christmas jokes.

Over and Out

For now.

Friday, December 9, 2011

You gotta love livin', baby, cause dyin' is a pain in the ass.


She tells me, I'm scared.

She just got done with an intense round of chemo. She finds out the results after the new year.

She tells me, I worry every day. I play "what if?" all day long.

She has 2 kids, 11 and 16. They do not have a dad, only a man, somewhere in town, with their same last name and a very short temper.

She tells me, I can't drink alcohol, it makes me sick. I ask her if it has always been this way. Yes. That's probably a good thing, I say. No. She wishes that it wasn't so. She wishes she had had more fun in her life. Like, real fun, she tells me. The kind of fun where you raise some hell and get yourself in and out of trouble.

I think we should throw a party for New Year's . It's my mom's birthday. Everyone could use some fun. No, she says. I'm too worried.

But what she's most worried about, besides bad news, is being in a funk and spoiling everyone else's mood. That's the way she's felt throughout her fight. She never complains. Even when she passes out standing at the counter, even when I direct her to her bed, she mutters lists of "to-dos," mumbling, I'll be fine, go, go.

I work with people who are in pain. I work with people who don't have all of their toes, who cannot snap their own bras, who cannot sleep through the night. I work with a woman who doesn't know if she will wake up tomorrow morning. But you know, I love it, what I do. I love being a part of these sufferer's journeys. To some, I am a sounding board. I can sometimes make the old ladies laugh, sometimes hold the kids when they cry. To some, I am a pain relief. The things I bring them release them from their lives. To some, I am just another shoulder to help them carry their load.

I am in a weird place in my life, working with a very grumpy, angry, sad population of people. But their unique insights on life, the joy that they have learned to derive from what I perceive as trivial, have made me a tiny bit wiser, stronger and happier to live this life I have.

Monday, December 5, 2011

Turns Out the Muppets Are Still Awesome

We saw the new Muppet movie, entitled The Muppets, this weekend. Good move on our part. Basically the Muppets rule because they don't age or try to go "serious" or whatever, and just spend decades and decades being extremely silly and extremely heartwarming. This movie was great, classic Muppet style, celebrating teamwork, singing, love, and the rainbow connection.

Best of all, it has the Fox Business Network's panties in a twist.

The basic plot of the movie is that an evil oil baron, aptly named Tex Richman and played wonderfully by Chris Cooper, has plotted to buy the Muppet studios, tear it down, and drill for oil where the buildings stand. Jason Seigel, Amy Adams, and Seigel's inexplicably puppet-like brother Walter (who, it turns out, is an incredible whistler), go find Kermit so they can get the rest of the gang back together for ONE LAST SHOW, as they say, to raise money to buy the studio back in time, yada yada yada. They live Muppetly ever after.

Fox's beef is that because the villain is an oil baron, Disney is brainwashing our children (America's children, I don't have any children) to be anti-oil, anti-corporations, and anti-America. Clark actually mentioned this as we were leaving the theater, mentioning his appreciation for the subtle nod towards environmentalism. Apparently not subtle enough for Fox (nothing is, really). I don't have anything really articulate or smart to say on the matter; my ridiculous meter for the Fox network blew up several years ago so I can't even think about how to respond. While we're here, though: the fact that they can't find anything else to talk about besides the supposed subliminal Communist messages in Disney movies drums up very little confidence, in, like, society in general or something. It's as if Fox News has finally graduated to the 7th grade, and will soon find out that someone whispers "Take of your clothes" in that scene in Aladdin.

It was them who whispered it.

And, for the record, there were bunches of little kids, ages ranged probably three to nine, and I don't think any of them know what the word "baron" means, or what oil is, or even Texas, for that matter, so it's hard to believe they'll take any stock in the bad guy in this movie (who, by the way, raps (?)), besides the fact that he's the bad guy, and scary music plays when he's on screen. They were just there to giggle at Fozzie's fart shoes and Miss Piggy hitting her head on the desk. It was a freaking Muppet movie, Fox, so stop trying to ruin our childhoods.