Seward's Folly Days 4 and 5: All-Ass-Ka

I can't even really remember what all we did on day four, but about eight hours of it was spent driving from Healy to Soldotna which was a positive experience only in that I never have to be in Healy again.

There was maybe some really tall mountain or something we passed on the way, but I didn't see shit. But really, it's beautiful here for the most part and my only beef is that every town is a weird patchwork of strip malls and seedy gas stations. I'm not going to make any political statements or anything, but Wasilla is absolutely rank and vile and disgusting, so it's no wonder people who come from there are fucked-up crazy as shit.

Highlights:

-A bomb-dot-com bagel with lox

-Killing myself

Day 5 was a Soldotna extravaganza. I have literally nothing to say about Soldotna. I had high hopes because I assumed for some reason it was a quaint little tourist/fishing town, but it was a soulless strip mall town. Ugh.

Anchorage is good so far. Lots of trees I guess is the nicest thing I can say about it. I know for an almost-fact that there's cool stuff to do here so I'll try to make an effort to not be a shitty asshole and have fun.

Our hotel has this gnarly wallpaper that's telling me Alaska was purchased for 7 million bones and makes America like multibillion dollars a year, so the second nicest thing I can say about this place is that it was a damned thrifty purchase on America's part.